I got a permanent scar today,
Because I was thinking of you.
Thinking that if your fingers burned,
From jalepenos and hot oven racks,
You would laugh,
Haha!!!
Let it sit,
It will be beautiful,
Purple.
Perpetual.
And so my fingers burn,
Burn with delight!!!
And they swell,
The burns,
Pink and sausage like,
Rising with fluid,
Shiny.
White veins of fat underneath.
And they hurt.
But I take the pain and run with it,
I run up and down the street,
Back and forth under the cold tap water,
Craving da soothing feel,
But stopping just short of relief,
The burn…
It burns too good.
I rub my eyes.
Not for punishment.
Just,
Out of habit.
And I can’t take it anymore,
My cuticles light themselves ablaze,
My fingernails recede into themselves,
And my skin begs to find Mr. Aloe.
My eyes say I’m dumb,
My mouth says don’t touch me!
And my fingers,
Still beg for relief…
I tell myself to endure!!!
That weakness is failure!!!
My scars are all chosen,
Not selectively frozen.
And I sit back and burn.
I sit back and think.
If I was truly hurt,
I’d be making a stink.
But I am overcome now,
My burns have just set,
Purple and throbbing,
Still, not quiet yet,
I’ll let them dry out,
Blisters and all,
Just poke them I say!
Let the goo fall,
Let my skin heal please,
My scars…
They can stay,
Because,
I see you in them,
Everyday…
