something like a eulogy(slightly off-key)

we have no history between us you and i
you ran into me and we glared in anger
me in my pettiness and you in yours
but these things are better left hidden- right?

my aunt died a few weeks ago
her schizophrenia caused self-righteous hypocrisy
i did not attend her funeral. did she know?
i could've put words in her casket- but isn’t that lying?

it hardly matters. If- doubtfully- a ghost of her
was there she would not have recognized me-
just as it was when she was alive. even my christ-eyed
cousin couldn’t give her the powers of identification.

for those who spoke the loudest at her death
their words stank the worst of compost heaps.
although compost heaps serve a purpose. do they?
human compassion and self-reflection gave way to piety.

so much now depends on how i move across the street
each step bleeding my humanity onto the concrete.
most of us will never meet- no matter our hunger
defeated before each action is even taken.

given this- it’s no wonder more of us do not
beat the reaper at his own game. must be the thrill
of seeing how far we can stretch each other’s will-
or to bet when the mask on one of us slips.

you and i want the same thing- i think.
i am tired- as i know you must be. did
you mention something about a loved one gone?
the snow is heavy outside. sit down and i'll buy you a drink.