This thing, they call it a disease
after 20 years it damn near killed me
It’s been over 2 years
but knowing I’ll never drink again
still brings me to tears
I watch people around me partying
and having fun
wishing it were me and I was the one
It seems like I can’t have fun anymore
I usually just go in my room daily and
close the door
It’s been a long 2 years
still craving the only thing that made
me feel invincible without fear
I didn’t stop drinking for myself but for my family
Sometimes I wish I was alone and drinking
sitting in a dark room where no one can find me
I’m not sure why I still crave it
but I pray to God daily to wash his essence over
me and bless me with his grace and spirit