struggle

  • Child of the night

    To you , my sweet child of the night - Where do you hide when your innocence is lost.

  • Daily Revalations

    Deprived of affection and a sense of belonging
    one retires to a sanctuary of isolation.
    Arraigned by the acute pain of rejection
    the walls become his or her world.

  • Dance back to me

    To you , my sweet child of the night - Where do you hide when your innocence is lost.

  • Death of a Broken Heart

                                            spirit,
    The thought of you lifts my 
                                                                y     .           .           .
                                                     a
                                            w
                                     a
    It lifts me so high I fly
    But then I f
                     a
                        l
                          l
                    for you bringing m
                                               e
                           back down to earth,
    But you weren't there to catch m
                                                   e
                               So I hit the ground,
                             And broke my  .   .   .  h . e . a . r . t .
     

  • Failure

    Why can't I ever look good in your eyes.
    Images and memories just flashing by. 
    I put in so much effort 
    But to you it doesn't matter because its not perfect. 
    Alone you treat me like dirt but in public you bury all the hurt. 
    You show people you with your mask on 
    Afraid to reveal what's really going on. 

  • Father dearest

    I've never been one to judge, 
    But it's come time for your reckoning. 
    Justified injustice of character, 
    Quite subpar. 

  • Her Broken Heart

    A ripped shell holds the inevitable
    The lost vow thought unbreakable
    Her swollen core cracking slowly
    Freeing the feelings she thought so lowly

  • Inamorata

    I breathe...

    The very essence of me

    Breathes in the deep scent of you.


    You are not my lover.

    I love you, but you are not my lover.

  • Judge Me Not

    What is it like to not be judged in a world where being yourself is just not enough? What is it like to be yourself and get a hug without being judged and getting mugged by someone who barely even knows you but they’re scared of what they think they know but don’t know anything about so they lash out on you and lose control, funny right? But I guess that’s how life goes people get mad about things they can’t control. How does it feel to be loved by someone who sees all your imperfections as a high and can see themselves with you for the rest of your life?

  • Memory

    My lifeless body roams the way a ghost does its' ancient mansion walls
     Invisible, I stumble through the world with a mask praying it doesn't fall 
     You destroyed me.
     Murdered my soul and shattered my spirit
     I am smashed stained glass -
     I am out together but in fractured pieces 
     I am transparent

  • Ode to the lighthouse

    I came to you with my wings ripped against my will like a wingless bird locked in a golden cage,
    I long to fly free above the skies, 
    beyond the stars and moon, 
    but i came to you to mend my wound,
    For the pain of worldly deception and contempt had left me bleeding,
    that i cry every night, silently, 
    weeping deep inside, loudly,
     

  • Oh Little Lady

    In the four walls closed,
    She's weaving her dreams,
    So fragile, she seems,
    Still hoping for good. 

    In her lonesome room,
    She is shedding tears,
    Does anyone care?
    Still caring for all.

  • One more try

    I yearn for death in the small of my back,

    Every crack in my bones ache for the pain. 

    I crave the feeling of a blade vertically down my wrist 

    The slipping of consciousness.

  • Selfishness

    abort your idealistic views. 
    Your physical certainty is lack lustered, 
    Coated with inadequacy. 

  • Stand Alone

    Stand alone girl,
    You are making it better, even alone, those arms will never hold you again, neither you will see their smile nor their shadows.

    That one who smiled at you on your triumph, yes he is smiling like an evil, then this one who cheers for you might not be cheering,
    But you still believe, cause you're ingenuous.

    Stand alone before all around you tries to drag you down,
    Cause one's victory isn't a beautiful story for others.

  • Struggle

    Life is hard
    It gets really hard sometimes
    From small things,
    Small fears, small worries, small problems
    Day by day it gets piled up
    Thought I’ve able to take a control of it
    Thought I’m already okay
    Without realizing that those piles are actually still there
    Until one single thing added up to those pile
    Causing all of them to break apart
    That’s when I realize
    I’ve never been okay
    Those small things are piling up
    To the point where I can’t bear anymore
    Where I fall to my knees
    And my tears break
    I feel like I barely hold on
    I wish I could just let go everything
    I wish I could end all of these
    Is dying the answer?
    To end all the pain I hold in this world
    The pain of incapable of doing anything
    The pain of keep wishing life will get better but never knowing when
    The pain of trying to live with this pain
     

  • Struggles of a Third Kind

    These days Mindy just sits there. Listening out for that inner voice. To pick up a fork to savour meals is turning into a daily chore. Time does so little to mend this resident hurt. It never seems to go away. At least she has been able to sleep. Thank God for that. Each wakeful moment only deepens the pain...

  • Synonym for sadness

    Overwhelmed. 
    Scared. 
    Paranoid. 
    Frightened. 
    These are a few of the words I use to describe myself. 

  • What it is to be mute

    Souls set alight by the softest of sparks
    Fumbling through the darkness 
    They meet at their lowest 
    Friends until daybreak and so much more
    For when I am with you I can soar
    Although it is but an easy life 
    The spark remains throughout it all 
    A gentle smile imprinted on my soul

  • When

    When do I tell you? When should I tell you? Life will soon send me on my way again and then it will be too late.