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Stream of Consciousness

User Rating: 5 / 5

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my pileup 
what have I done? 
anxiety's and pain's compacted potions 
spirited water and nature's succour 
self-medicated 
self-mediated 
self-mutilated 
and self-induced deprecation 
my forlorn longings and dreams 
have all but swarmed over and consumed me 
yet melted inside and dripping down 
leaking out of the crevices of my soul's bounty 
sunken now 
sinking to the ground which surrounds 
my entity of mysterious energy 
I sweep across the night 
in a dead flight 
to awake in the day 
an empty shell in dismay 
far from the extremes of eternity 
wherever they might be 
this concept of infinity 
perhaps an illusion of some greater mind 
which finds an amusement 
in our sullen kind 
grains of sand in Its hands 
sifting out into frozen space and time 
never changing 
always repeating the same histories 
in a constant spinning of dizzy existence 
without resistance 
we stay 
in this haze 
and fight for the days 
in disarray 
but always stagnant 
in this complacent phase 
may we rot in decrepit isolation 
inside the greater outdoors of desolation 
so much more there is in store 
yet we shall never reach beyond these shores 
for my deprivation 
here in this aggravation 
I stand above my body's station 
and know not how to move its creation 
removed from the place in time 
where the sun once actually shined 
in my open mind 
of the purest kind 
the innocence lost 
in adulthood's holocaust 
sitting still 
in the hopes that fill 
my heart with an unexpressed thrill 

Comments (2)

This comment was minimized by the moderator on the site

Welcome to Hennen's Observer! This is by far your best poem I think. There is much less rhyming and I feel like I am getting your soulish thoughts straight from the tap. Also, I can tell that you are experimenting with many different forms...

Welcome to Hennen's Observer! This is by far your best poem I think. There is much less rhyming and I feel like I am getting your soulish thoughts straight from the tap. Also, I can tell that you are experimenting with many different forms judging from your other work. Great job!

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Joshua Hennen
This comment was minimized by the moderator on the site

Hello! Thank you for your detailed review. I just found out about the website yesterday and just realized that the homepage is where the community is located! I tend to like rhyme and meter and styles like the pantoum, but sometimes raw...

Hello! Thank you for your detailed review. I just found out about the website yesterday and just realized that the homepage is where the community is located! I tend to like rhyme and meter and styles like the pantoum, but sometimes raw emotion solicits a flow of its own in people when they write to the "rhythm" of their racing minds without analyzing. This is a nice website. I have already recommended it to a friend who is an artist/writer.

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Rosaline George
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